Based on our last show where Rich and I spent quite a bit of time recounting the exploits and attributes of Chuck Norris, you all should know that I'm fascinated with the odd fixations that overwhelm popular internet culture.  Often called memes, these concepts, phrases, or images latch onto our brain and spread in a viral pattern.  Like most busy parents, I often get infected with these memes late in their lifecycle.

Take for instance the meme of "Goatse".  Not one for the weak of stomach, the Goatse phenomenon has been spreading (pun intended) around the web for some time now.  I filed it away in the recesses of my brain and hoped to forget it.  But, along came this book cover to rehydrate the dormant meme.

For more information on Goatse (NOT work-safe, I assure you), see the Wikipedia entry.  I apologize in advance for passing this on to those lucky souls who have not yet been infected. 

Tag.  You're it. 

Welcome back my friends to the show that never ends...  This week we're severely time shifted

• Breaking stereotypes - there IS a difference between being religious and being Right Wing
• The US Conference of Catholic Bishops ask for the troops to come home
  
• Vin: 2001 Keenan Cabernet Sauvignon
• OK, we're finishing the bottle now
• Tune 1: See Ya' Next Tour by the Fiendz
• Encryption Software
• PGP
• GPG
  
• Tune 2: Acunamanacana by Stoat
• Mercedes SUV vs. Toyota Prius
• Adios Muchachos!
  

No, I'm not suggesting that people eat In-N-Out Burgers to lose weight.  I'm suggesting that people read this post and lose their appetite.

Some friends gathered together one night and ate a 100-patty In-N-Out cheeseburger.  The photos alone made me sick to my stomach. 

Here are some lovely stats:

• Total calories: 19490
  
• Total eaters 8 (2 girls and one guy who already ate dinner and only ate 6 patties)
• Most patties eaten by one person : about 20 (including the raw ones)
• Time to finish : less then 2 hours
• Number of people who barfed : 1 (way to go Elena!)

Carnival Of The Liberals is now calling for your best Liberal blogging in their latest Carnival round.  Your submissions can be sent here.  Go on in, join the them and have some fun.

We're back, and we fear Chuck Norris:

• This Chuck Norris site is a riot!
  
• Tune 1: Watercolors by Bill
• Our digital rights are eroding again
• Google fights the good fight against the DOJ
• We don't salute the Broadcast flag
• New Steven Soderbergh film, Bubble, is released under new distribution model
  
• Tune 2: Almond Sculpture by Reason Disappears
• Vin: Old Faithful...I mean 2003 Rosemount Shiraz
  
• On Film: The Squid and the Whale
• C U L8r!
  

Welcome back.  Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, we bring you:

• Shout out to Martin from Writingsonthewall.net
• Specifically, take a gander at his "about" page
• Vin: 2001 Keenan Cabernet Sauvignon
  
• Tune 1: Celebrate Quick by Stoat
• More death penalty nonsense
• Dysfuntion in the workplace, and how management relates to parenting
• Tune 2: More by Hans Storsberg
• On Film: Proof
• Hasta luego!
  

LEAVE ME ALONE!!

I went to Sonne's Bike shop today to find some new cycling shoes.  My metatarsals have been hurting lately, and I think it is being caused by my old shoes.

I started talking to this seemingly nice man, and when the conversation turned to his moving away from the area, he asked me if I had ever considered moving away, and to where.  I said that I thought the Raleigh-Durham NC region was nice, and he agreed.  He said it also had the added benefit of being in the Bible Belt.  Ugh, here we go...

I told him that if there was one reason why I wouldn't move there, that was why.  He asked why, I answered, and he then went on to tell me the same old crap that these people have been telling me for years.  Yeah yeah yeah, I'm evil, I'm going to hell, his (this man's) path was the ONE TRUE WAY, and I needed to join him.

Instead of joining him, I paid for my shoes, wished him a Happy New Year, and went on my way (I think he was still talking, but I had already been very patient with him.)

I can't wait to try my new shoes on my trainer tomorrow.  I ended up buying a pair of Specialized Comp Road.  They fit well, and the price was right.

Mr. Fripp:

Say it ain't so, Bob...say it ain't so.  It has recently come to my attention that you have been vacationing in the Pacific Northwest of the United States.  When I say Pacific Northwest, I really mean Redmond, WA.  And, when I say vacationing, I really mean visiting Microsoft's campus to collaborate with them on audio for Windows Vista.  When I said audio, I mean random system sounds.

This may sound like the whimpering of a devoted fan, one that feels that his idol should be encased in lucite and remain the musician and artist he loves, and in some ways it is, but please reconsider getting involved with system sounds.  Hordes of people will be exposed to your skill and talent -- not a bad thing -- except those hordes will never explore your previous work.  Forever more, you will be "the guy that did the Vista beeps".

If you're short on cash, I'd be happy to start a collection.  If you want more noteriety, there are options...like threatening the president, streaking in a World Cup match, wearing a rainbow wig at the Super Bowl, editing your own Wikipedia entry...you get the picture.

Your number one fan,

John
 

OK, I'll play along.

1) I like drinking wine out of Tiki Heads.  This is an established fact.  Now that I think of it, I like all sorts of strange drinkwear.  I even like drinking beverages out of JFK memorial highball glasses.
2) My thumbs are a bit too flexible.  I can bend them backwards and touch my wrists.  I've been able to do this for as long as I can remember having thumbs.  I don't know if I'm technically "double-jointed" or if I've just stretched my ligaments.
3) I was the Zodiac Killer.  No, seriously, I killed a Zodiac.  It got on my nerves.
4) Sometimes, when no one is looking, I cry while watching sad movies.  Promise you won't tell anyone at the VFW.  I even cry at the occasional commercial.  I think it means I'm either a sensitive guy or unstable.
5) About once every few years, I dream in cartoon.  Rich probably wouldn't like them either.  These aren't dreams of Bugs Bunny or Ren 'N Stimpy, these are dreams populated with friends and family...but they're cartoons.

 Whoa, look at the time.  I almost forgot to take my medication.

Now that we've played one game of Internet Tag, another one seems to have come around the bend.  This one comes from Kirsten at Enjoy Every Sandwich.  In this one, we're supposed to list five weird things about ourselves and tag five other people.  I'm not entirely sure what "weird" is, but I'll do my best.

 1) I am a "Space-Geek" who does not like to fly.  I think it's a heights thing combined with a lack of control.

 2)  People often think my diet is "weird."   :-)

 3)  I am not particularly motivated by money.  I think we should just be rid of that whole system.  I am motivated by excellence.

 4) I don't think babies or puppies are cute.  I am told that our brains are wired so that when we see things with small faces and big eyes, we go ga-ga, but I guess they forgot to make that connection in my brain when they wired me.  (Last night, a friend suggested that this might also be why I don't like Anime... interesting.... but the truth is, I've never really liked cartoons.... I mean animation)

 5) I think most rock & roll sucks.  It's typically written in boring time signatures and played by awful musicians.  I hate the Rolling Stones, and if the Beatles didn't have John Lennon, I'd hate them too.

I believe I am supposed to pass this along to five people, but I don't think I know five people with blogs, so I pass it along to Leo at the Neural Gourmet, Martin at Writings On The Wall, and all of the fabulous babes in the Lascivious Biddies, over at BiddyBlog.  John, are you going to play?  Wassail.

On this verbal free-for-all you can expect to hear:

• Vin: Genesis Hogue 2001 Cabernet Sauvignon
• Drinking from Tiki Heads again (see above)
  
• Rich is up in arms and calling on the hordes of Veggie Fans to bring their virtual pitchforks and torches to the Munson Williams Proctor Arts Institute
• Pat Robertson is out of his mind
• Tune 1: After You've Gone by Ukenasia
• 20 Questions with the love child of Satan and a Yo-Yo
• Please feel free to submit an object and we'll try to stump the demonic device
• Tune 2: Spinning Wheel by The Badly Bent
• Film: Crimen Ferpecto (no it's not a typo)
• Rich's quick bi...um...complaint
• Shout out to Martin at Writings On The Wall
  
• Adios muchachos!

 A new political party focused on decriminalizing would-be Internet piracy and making copyrighted material free for all is planning to run in Sweden's next general elections.  While I am not a big fan of single-issue politics, I do approve of this effort because it has great potential to show how much more democratic a parliamentary system is, than our own.

Within a parliamentary system, if a particular party gets enough votes, that same percentage is awarded to them in parliamentary seats.  This means that the party in question actually GETS representation, as opposed to our undemocratic two-party system that throws half of the votes away in every election.  Once the party has the seats they can increase their own power by joining coalitions and (in essence) bargaining their votes in less critical times (to them) for future support in more critical moments.

It will be interesting to see if, and how many seats this new party gets.

It's bad enough that these infernal nuts made their way into my shopping cart, but now I can't seem to stop eating them.  I think we need a special prosecutor to investigate pistachio farms to see if they're injecting these little guys with heroin.

Yes, I'm a horrible copycat and wanted to get in on this game.  Apparently I'm a sucker for anything that asks me to list a few of my favorite things.

Four jobs you’ve had in your life: Movie Theatre Concessions Thug, Animation In-Betweener, Advertising Artist, Software Developer

Four movies you could watch over and over: The Godfather (I or II), Raising Arizona, Taxi Driver, Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory

Four places you’ve lived: Utica NY, Boston MA, Syracuse NY, Rockville MD

Four TV shows you love to watch: Mythbusters, Lost, The Sopranos, House Hunters

Four places you’ve been on vacation: Cross-country road trip to Devil's Tower WY, Sanibel Island FL, Las Vegas NV, Montreal Canada

Four websites you visit daily: CNN, BoingBoing, Yankees.com, Makezine

Four of your favorite foods: Pasta with Pesto, Grilled Cheese Sammich, Peanut Butter, Artichokes

Four places you’d rather be: Any mountain in Colorado with a snowboard strapped to my feet, The North end of Boston, Bologna Italy, Montana

Four albums you can’t live without: King Crimson - Court of the Crimson King, Genesis - Foxtrot, King Crimson - Starless and Bible Black, The Beatles White Album

Four favorite science fiction authors: Stephen R. Donaldson, Robert Heinlein, Arthur C. Clarke, Douglas Adams

Does doubling up on a site cause some sort of memetic mutation?

What's this you ask?  It's apparently the modern equivalent of a chain letter, but this one does not have a famous software mogul paying us a lot of money at the end.  Perhaps it's a more mundane equivalent of the famous questionaire written by the great Benard Pivot, that he and James Lipton ask of their guests on their shows.  Either way, I have decided to answer it.

I'd like to thank Leo over at The Neural Gourmet for tagging me and allowing me to do this.   Also, please remember that these answers are in no particular order, and probably change from week to week, so here goes nuthin:

Four jobs you’ve had in your life: Audio Engineer/Producer, Marketing, Technical Coordinator, Shoe Salesman.

Four movies you could watch over and over: The Station Agent, Good Bye Lenin!, Star Wars (Episode IV), 2001: A Space Odyssey

Four places you’ve lived: Utica NY, Chillicothe OH, Hackensack NJ, Marcy NY

Four TV shows you love to watch: Star Trek (most flavors), Ebert & Roeper at the Movies, What Not To Wear (guilty pleasure), Extreme Home Makeover (my other guilty pleasure)

Four places you’ve been on vacation: Newfoundland Canada, Seattle Washington, Colombia South America, Cape Canaveral

Four websites you visit daily: The Internet Movie Database, Truthout, Libsyn, Babelfish

Four of your favorite foods: Pasta, Black Bean Soup, Broccoli, Apple Pie

Four places you’d rather be: Olympus Mons/Valis Marinaris - Mars, London, San Francisco, Hadley-Apennine region - The Moon

Four albums you can’t live without: Steve Morse - High Tension Wires, Gentle Giant - Freehand, Various - J.S. Bach, Allan Holdsworth - Metal Fatigue

Four favorite science fiction authors: Frederick Pohl, Kim Stanley Robinson, Isaac Asimov, John DeChancie

It now appears that my duties are done, and I pass the torch to Kirsten, author of the Enjoy Every Sandwich blog. Please be careful that you don't get burned, and please pass it along to another unsuspecting, yet responsible denizen of the blogosphere, when you are done.

Our first show of the New Year includes:

• Rich's list of crap...um...topics
• Vin: Nicolas Catena, 2002 Malbec Mendoza (Argentina)
• BTW, visit our Wine List to see all of the bottles consumed on the show
  
• Music: Mind's Eye by Root Valdez
• Privacy and wiretapping - it's a cliche, but Orwell was onto something
• Phil Zimmerman
  
• The Truthout article we talked about on the show
  
• Film: Forty Shades of Blue
• Note: Jack Klugman played Ross in the Twilight Zone episode titled "Death Ship" (1963)